So remember a few weeks’ ago when I spoke of ants as big as houses? Well it turns out that they’re that big, because they’re homing poison. Yes, that’s correct everyone. It seems that unexpectedly, we are the proud new parents of 178,345 fire ants!
A lot has been said about fire ants in the media – clear evidence of their popularity. So, drum roll please… we’ve decided to cater for such demand, by getting into fire-ant breeding! When an opportunity like this presents itself, you really must take it as a sign. We were up all night talking about the possibilities!
We’ve called this one Andrew.
Seriously – just think how wonderful a Christmas present they’d make (we’re actually anticipating a massive rush after publication of this piece), so if you want fire-ants as a Christmas gift for your loved ones – best to get in now. We’ll have so many back-orders, I just know it.
I couldn’t think of any better pet to have around the home. They’re so cuddly, interesting, and they feed themselves. Plus, they have personality! They’re quick, and have true zing to them! Forget dogs…fire ants are far more exciting!
Plus, I guarantee that if you buy two, you’ll get several million for free.
There really is no better investment.
To test just how big the demand is for this pet breed, this weekend we’re going to pop down to the local country markets. We’ll pile our fire ants into the car, and when we get there we’ll charge $5 for children to pat them. I might even let them roam around the markets as a ‘teaser’. I know the other market stall holders will really love it. Our being there is going to attract HUGE crowds.
They’re very affectionate.
